Saturday, March 13, 2010

Percy Jackson and the Olympians: The Lightning Thief

Let’s make this quick.


Percy Jackson (Logan Lerman): Looks like he belongs in a High School Musical sequel.

Annabeth (Alexandra Daddario): Should age well.

Grover (Brandon T. Jackson): A satyr, meaning he’s half goat, which is creepy enough but he makes it more so.

Zeus (Sean Bean): Looks uncomfortable in a toga.

Poseidon (Kevin McKidd): Looks uncomfortable.

Hades (Steve Coogan): Can we have the whole movie about him?

Medusa (Uma Thurman): Runs an antique shop, I cannot tell you how weird this is.

Persephone (Rosario Dawson): Is not on screen nearly long enough.

Chiron (Pierce Brosnan): Is a centaur, enough said.

Plot: Thin, at best.

Dialogue: Insulting to the audience.

Moral: Gods make bad parents.

My opinion: Dear Hollywood, please stop. Seriously, please stop.

No comments:

Post a Comment